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binglebears Aug 22, 2009

I could use some advice from all of the doggy mommy and daddies here.  My husband and I returned from a trip a few days ago--we were gone for a week and our two daughters are still on vacation (with my parents) and won't return until the 31st.  Our little dog, Bingley (shih-tzu--poodle mix), just doesn't seem quite himself yet. I'm not sure if he just misses the girls, their energy, and the entertainment they provide. Or if he's still recovering from his time at the "doggy motel." He's not eating particularly well, he's somewhat lethargic, and he follows me from room to room.

Last time he stayed at the doggy motel, which is over a year now, he absolutely loved it--I wasn't sure he even wanted to come home with us. But this time, he apparently had a very bad case of homesickness. I suppose it would be called separation anxiety. He was fine as long as he was with the "motel" owners or playing with other dogs, but when he was alone, nothing could soothe him--he was just beside himself and would bark and bark. He's not a "barky" dog, so this was rather unlike him. He's still hoarse from it all. He also developed stomach problems and lost weight while he was there. Poor little guy.

I must admit I'm concerned about him. We're supposed to go on two other trips this year--one in October and one in December. The "motel" will take him one more time on a trial basis. In other words, if he doesn't "improve" they won't allow him to stay there anymore. Thankfully, a very sweet neighbor who loves dogs and adores Bingley has said she will give him a try and see if he feels more comfortable staying at her house. In the meantime, I'm going to talk to our vet to see if she has any suggestions to help him to feel more comfortable while we are away.

I'm just not quite sure what to do or to think about it.  He's a sweet little dog and rather well-behaved.  His only "fault" is that he occasionally gets rather silly in the evening when he's really overtired and he wants to play with the girls like they are puppies.  The vet says that he's just acting like a toddler then and seems to think we handle the situation well.  But this one is making me feel rather stumped.  As my husband noted, first you are supposed to get the dog attached to you and then what are you supposed to do?--push him away so you will be able to leave him without him missing you.  How do those two things go together?

Thanks for listening,
Cheryl

Carolynn Aug 23, 2009

I am a cat mommy, but we had a similar thing. My experience was that the fur baby has a personal preference where they want to be.... Your motel may be stunning but he just doesn't like it...  We found this out the hard way. Dino's gran used to look after our cat when we went away, she used to pop into our place a couple of times a day, play with Madam etc. But when we got home she used to display the worst social behavior every. (Take that for leaving her behind) Then Gran moved, the following time we put her into a stunning cattery. Cosy place to sleep, beautiful run with scratch pads, the whole bit. Her own food, toys and my dressing gown. She was not a happy cat. Then Dino was away and I had to go away for a few days, but Madam was on a strict medical regime at the time and I spoke to the vet. He said he would keep her there for a few days. I was beside myself, hospital type environment, boring cage etc. Anyhow, when I went to fetch her I had the distinct impression she didn't really want to come home. See, because of the medical condition she had picked up she had gotten to know the vet and assistants really well, and they liked her, so they chatted and played with her a lot. Go figure, the place that I thought would be the worst, and spent 3 nights stressing about her, turned out to be her favorite.

And 2 dogs that I had used to prefer different kennels.....

Good luck with this, it is distressing when you have to be away and you don't think your animals are happy.

DebbieD Aug 23, 2009

You don't say how old your fur baby is, but one product you might try at home for the transitioning is DAP.  Its something that was coming into vogue as I was forced into retiring from dog grooming (early retirement due to overworking my wrists    ).  DAP stands for Dog Appeasing Pheramone.  Essentially its the smell the mommy dog secretes as the puppies are nursing.  So all in all it tells a dog 'all is well, Mommy's here, all is well'. 

I've never personally used it, but in the last 6 months of my dog grooming, my customers raved about how excellent the results were.  And they used it for a variety of separation anxiety. 

As for doggy motels, I found next door neighbors worked for my childhood pets the best, or at the least, keeping our pets at home where they were most comfortable.  It must be noted, our pets were not remotely territorial!  (not for your baby, shih tzus rarely are, but for others who may be lurking  ), so it worked well to have a neighbor stop by and feed/water and chat with our pets.  Most of the time they slept nonstop. 

And lastly, I sincerely doubt it, but if your pet is running a temperature or is slightly 'off' or their stool/behavior is otherwise different, get them into the vets.  Its conceivable they may have picked up a flu or bug whilst being boarded.  NOT saying the place they stayed is awful.  Far from it.  Its kinda like a bunch of kids right after school starts.  Everyone's stressed and before you know it they're swapping a flu around. Ditto can happen with pups at a boarding kennel. My own local vets say the pups must have a vaccine for kennel cough before they can come in, so that tells ya something right there.  Nothing deadly, but your pup may be feeling 'off' because he really is feeling off.

Daphne Aug 23, 2009

My first thought is to have your vet look at Bingley to be sure he doesn't have a bug, infection, parasite, etc. that's making him lathargic and not eat well. That would be a concern to me.

If he's healthy then yes, it's probably emotional. I learned the hard way that cooing and fussing over a dog who is showing emotional behavior... moping, pouting, etc. only encourages more of the behavior because they learn that they'll get attention that way. I don't know if you are doing this or not... it was a natural reaction for me to feel bad and make a fuss over my dog and I learned it was the wrong thing so just passing it on. I don't have advice on how to bring Bingley out of his emotional state if that's indeed his problem. Take him for rides? Go on extra long walks and burn off some of that negative energy perhaps?

I dog sit for three of my neighbors when they go away and they've all found their dogs are much better off staying at home and having me come in a few times a day than sending them to a boarding facility. In fact, my vet recommends the same thing..... leave your dog at home with someone if you can. Its familiar... your scents are there... the dog can relax. If your neighbor is willing to take Bingley overnight at her house next time you go away perhaps she'd be willing to have a practice run or two before you go again... get him used to being there overnight and if he starts barking excessively she can bring him right back to you!

Do have him checked out by a vet to be sure he's not sick though.

binglebears Aug 23, 2009

Ohhh, Carolynn, Debbie, and Daphne, thank you all for such good advice!  I don't think he has a bug or anything because his stool is back to normal, but I'm still bringing him to the vet on Wednesday just to make sure.

Bingley is just shy of 2 years old so I think I will try to find some DAP.  Anything to help the little guy feel more comfortable.  He seems to do pretty well when we leave for just a few hours, but I don't think using DAP for those times will hurt anything either. 

I thought he would love the doggy motel since he loved it so much the last time we boarded him.  Now, though, I wonder whether they really babied him a lot the first time he was there since he was only 5 months old and this time they probably expected him to be "grown up" about us leaving him.  Our neighbor has already volunteered to give Bingley a trial run for a night or two, so, after reading your suggestions, I think I will take her up on that.

And, yes, Dapne, it is so hard not to baby him right now, but we have been making a conscious effort to act as if everything is and has been normal.  If anything, I'm afraid we're ignoring him too much!  He seems to be taking it in stride though--he's not quite his normal self, but things aren't quite normal around here anyways without the girls.  They'll be back in another week, so we'll see how things settle in then.

Thanks again for all of your wonderful advice!  I feel like I have a "game plan" now.
Warmly,
Cheryl