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eastbenchbears East Bench Bears
Chicago, IL
Posts: 133

Hello all my lovely bear friends! I have a date tomorrow night, my first in a few years, and I am FREAKING OUT!!!!!!! I know, I am going to be myself in all my teddy bear-lovin glory, but I am still so nervous! What do I say? Talk about? Wear???
Please, lend me some advice, or at least a bear hug until tomorrow!
Love and hugs,
Anita bear_original :pray:

Okay...so he was really nice, and really cute, but I am pretty sure it was a one time thing. bear_original But, it's okay, because now at least I feel much more confident and able to do this again sometime! Thanks for the hugs and advice all!
Love,
Anita bear_original

MAY 11- Okay guys, so he emailed me and we are going out again next week!!!! bear_original THANK YOU for all your advice and hugs! Wish me luck!!!
Love,
Anita

Jennskains Posts: 2,203

:hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:

Jack&Lilia Jack & Lilia
Gloucestershire
Posts: 3,488
Website

Anita how exciting!....just relax be yourself  bear_rolleyes  wear something comfortable you can put on and forget about ....but not your favourite cardi!  bear_grin  ....ask lots of questions and the conversation will just unfold....and have a fab time!  bear_thumb  do let us know how it goes too!  bear_flower
good luck hugs  :hug:  lynne

patsylakebears Patsy Lake Bears
Sydney
Posts: 3,442

:hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:

DebbieD Posts: 3,540

:hug:  :hug:  I agree, just be yourself.  And if you're nervous, let him do the talking at first.  I bet he's just as freaked out as you are  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:   Don't forget to breathe, laugh and have fun  :bday:

chris009av Real Deal Bears
Posts: 2,234

:hug:  :hug:  :hug:  my advice.... ENJOY!!!!!

Dilu Posts: 8,574

Wear clean underware and don't pick your nose.....

otherwise you should do just fine. 

Hey it's not like you're the only gal in the world and yet you were the one chosen.....there must be a reason!

I read a study once that said overwhealmingly that solid confident people are attracted to confident people.

What time will you be getting home?

will we be getting a followup?


are we nosey?


You betcha!!!


have fun  :hug:

gollyhugs
dilu bear_grin

Laura Lynn Teddy Bear Academy
Nicholasville, KY
Posts: 3,653
Website

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I agree Anita - relax and have fun!!   :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:

cherylbruinwerks Bruinwerks
Edmonton
Posts: 784

How exciting! Its been awhile for this old married chickie but I agree with everyone else - just be yourself, wear something comfy & not too tight, smell really good & wear the best accessory - a warm smile!
Be sure to tell us all about it!
:hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:
Cheryl

TamiL Dolls N Dreams
Aurora, Colorado
Posts: 6,454

Just be yourself, on the conversation, ask questions, listen and share !

SueAnn Past Time Bears
Double Oak, Texas
Posts: 21,721

SueAnn Help Advisor, Banner Sponsor

Woohoo, Anita, that's exciting!  At least I guess it is . . . I've been married for 43 years, so am not exactly up on the current dating scene.  I also agree with wearing something comfy - at my age, I'm all about everything comfortable.  If you know what his interests are, ask questions about those - men are always eager to talk about stuff they're into.  If it gets boring, change the subject.  Do you know this guy at all or is it somewhat like a blind date?  You'll be fine, I'm betting.  Hope it's a really fun experience.   :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:

eastbenchbears East Bench Bears
Chicago, IL
Posts: 133

Great advice all! THANK YOU! :)
Yes, it is somewhat of a blind date, and actually (you are going to laugh out loud at this one!) he is my father's best friend's nephew. He seems really nice though, and I do promise to come back here and tell all!
With much love and hugs,
Anita

lapousmor Sophie Z'Ours
Sarthe, France
Posts: 2,770

Hey, Anita, i hope you will have a lovely time with him!
Just be yourself and always be honnest (hummm, I guess you will  bear_tongue ).
Do not wear clothes you are not used too.

Have fun!

Beary hugs,
Sophie.

Carolyn Green Draffin Bears
Auckland New Zealand
Posts: 5,354
Website

How exciting for you Anita  bear_flower

I hope that your date goes well.

Hugs
Carolyn
:hug:  bear_flower  :hug:

JulietK julietk
London
Posts: 66

bear_flower good luck and have fun  bear_original

Melbear Melbear's Quality Collectibles
Spruce Grove, Alberta
Posts: 527
Website

heehee, Oh date jitters.. blah! I use to get so nervous before a date I would almost make myself sick!  :hug:  :hug:
One tip, if you don't know what to say.. ask him questions. That always worked well for me. Lots of topics, work, pets, relatives, hobbies... and people are always  bear_ermm  bear_ermm when you tell them you make Teddy bears! that is a great thing to talk about! heehee. Hope you have fun!
Hugs!
Melanie

Michelle Helen Chaska, Minnesota
Posts: 2,897

Dear Anita: Well now, what do yo say? I think it is a good idea to get him talking about himself. But...now listen well here....ask him about his family, job, friends and hobbies....men like to talk about themselves but more important, it will tell you if you want to go out with him again.

So, if he says he is estranged from his family, had a bad childhood....this is a man you want to run far away from...If he reports, domestic violence growing up, that is not a good sign. This type of man makes a terrible partner in life and will most likely repeat behaviors he witnessed in the home...but if he has a loving family and is close to them, he most like will treat you with respect, care and love too.

Watch how much alcohol he drinks. He slugs down several drinks and appears sober, run for your life....that means a possible alcohol dependence and you don't need that in your life....If he reports family member are drug addicts and alcoholics....it is not a good sign. For if you end up marrying this guy…well dependency can be inherited.

Job situation, well if he reports several jobs in the past year, that could mean he is not consistent, does not get along at work, or is not very ambitious and employers terminates his employment....

Now, what do you say about yourself...avoid past relationships. Don't "down" yourself. Speak positively about your accomplishments. You want him to walk away feeling you have a lot to offer and is a positive person. Speak passionately about the things you love like bear making.  Men do not want to think they are going out with someone "desperate" or lonely.

If you find nothing to say, engage in conversation about the local news (though stay away from politics and religion).

Now, go out and have a good time....Let us know how it goes.

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