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edie Jun 21, 2006

Success is not being better than anyone else but rather being better than I used to be."

Great words to live by for sure, Judi! Success is not something we achieve and keep forever it is an ongoing struggle just like life!

It is hard not to compare ourselves to others in the bear world - I am always happy to see someone doing very well in the bear business and getting fantastic prices for their bears and would never begrudge them that, but at the same time there is always a little tiny voice inside saying "why can't I get prices like that for my bears - what's wrong with them - or what am I doing wrong - etc. etc. Then I will get a note from someone saying they LOVE my bears but just can't afford to buy one and I'm ready to just give them away to someone who will really appreciate them, or a bear goes really low on ebay and I am feeling a bit down about it and then I get a note from the buyer about how thrilled they are to have finally been able to get one of my bears and again the money means NOTHING! I don't think success has anything to do with money, or selling the most bears, or anything like that - I think success is doing our best and striving for improvement and hopefully leaving our little corner of the world better than we found it - enriching others and ourselves along the path of this thing called "life".

Bear hugs, Edie

bearlysane Jun 21, 2006

Dear Judi,
This is from a little book I keep close by for when I'm feeling blue:

"Give yourself the courage to meet the valley days when they come.

For life is not a walk along a level roadway, but a long journey over hills and valleys, and the valleys are much a part of the journey as are the hilltops. Take away the valleys, and there would be no hills.

We have hilltop days and valley days and the trick in life is not to be discouraged when the valley days come, not to be surprised when they come, not to be alarmed, not to believe all of life ahead is to be a valley day.

Never forget that discouragement is part of the plan, and that if we will only take to the road fearlessly, walk on, one step and then another, so hilltop will follow valley as surely as day follows night"

This has always given me hope, when I felt everything was hopeless.

Big Beary Hugs,
Sandi

kassiebears Jun 21, 2006

Judi I am blue that you are blue my friend.  :hug: But, that is ok too. We can all walk with each other and be with each other in all ways of friendship, threw happiness, sadness, laughter, and even tears.

just my general two cents worth
There are  so many wonderful sayings here and nice words.  I have a saying I like very much and have it around the house. I even made a kitchen hanger for it, so it hangs in my kitchen for all to see.

Love and appreciation lives in the Heart, to find it; is to, get past ourselves.

I believe this applies to all life, home, family, neighbors, friends, and work. It is only a guide to remind us to be kind and understanding with others. Now, that does not mean being like Mashi here and doing this ha ha
I believe in balance in all things and I found it helps a lot in life.
My children were raised with this saying and to this day they have it in their home. Which is kinda nice to know as a parent that you have instilled something wonderful in their lives. 

hugs Judi dear friend  :hug:  :hug:

jenny Jun 21, 2006

Some times it's hard not to feel down despite all the good things going on...It can happen to me...and not just about my bears...but it often is because I put soooo much of me into them and they aren't just a teddy bear to me.

I think it's only natural to compare oneself to others...as it is the only yardstick we have...along with customer comments and those of friends and family (that I never take seriously as my mother would like anything I make)..and it does feel like the whole world is against you some days.

I have had some pretty low times since my bear-making started ...and though I felt low I decided that I would be positive and work harder still...and on that note I always think that without the people and the things that conspired to hurt me..I would never be doing what I am doing now. So I have them to thank....and in a funny way....it might be Gods way of making me push myself even harder !!

nettie Jun 21, 2006

Judi,
Sorry you are blue
heres what to do
sit in a chair
and hug a favourite bear!!!

I hope you win piggy Peggy Judi.I like the thought of her staying with you.We have bonded a bit which is unusual for me.
Like all things in life your blue days will pass.
Hugs Diane xxx

jenny Jun 21, 2006

Hi Lisa..I am glad you think I make sense!!!! The one thing about being a bearmaker is that you get time to think..a luxury most people don't have!!! I try to rationalise everything ..and I do stop and think things through...and it's the thinking it through that makes me feel positive..because it's all too easy to dwell on negatives.

All Bear Jun 21, 2006

Hey Sweetie, you keep on smiling!  Whatever has made you down, will pass.  :hug:

Helena Jun 21, 2006

Success is crossing the finish line in a race,the crowd cheering you on, and you have a stupid grin on your face- but you DID it,even if you near the end of the runners coming in !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lynette

My 4-yr-old daughter ran in a race at her school sports day last year. Now, she's not the tallest little girl, doesn't have the longest legs and is therefore not the fastest. But she put all her effort into it and crossed the finishing line....last! (awww!). Preparing for tears I walked up to her and was greeted by a huge grin instead. She said 'I won! Mummy, I won!'. She thought the sticker they gave her (and the rest of the kids) meant she'd won! And I didn't tell her otherwise, 'cos she's a winner in my eyes!!!!

Now that's success! 

Helena Jun 21, 2006

Judi, I just read the rest of the thread...and hope you're feeling a little brighter today. I had a blue mood last week and know how it feels. It can be hard to shake sometimes.

I sometimes visualise myself in a bubble (don't laugh!) where nothing can get through and hurt me. Only the good things are allowed in. It works - why not try it? It might help.

Huge hugs to you - you don't deserve to feel down.  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:

Marie_ Jun 21, 2006

Oh Judi, I'm sorry that you were blue today...
Here is hugs from me. I hope your blue feeling will
fly away soon.  :hug: 

"Success is not being better than anyone else but rather being better than I used to be."

Dr.Wayne Dyer.

great word Judi. 

Hugs/Marie

bearlysane Jun 21, 2006

Hi girls,
Got side tracked earlier by Judi's blue feeling. Back to the subject matter.

A Measure of Success by Nelson Boswell

Children have a way of cutting through to the heart of an issue and showing an unbiased and objective view of things.
A boy was told to write a sentence about his family. So after dinner one evening he went to his room and began working on the project. In a few minutes he came to his mother with a carefully printed sentence that read: "We are rich".
Well, his mother obviously did not want a sentence like that going around the school so she tried to explain to the boy that though his father worked for a financial institution, it did not automatilcally mean they were rich....
The boy returned to his room to try again. In a few moments he returned with another sentence which read: "We are poor".
Well by this time his parents realised that some further explanation was required. They explained that they were not poor either. Just because you are not rich, does not mean you are poor. They were someplace in between.
Well, the youngster returned to his room for a third try. He came down again with the sentence: "We are happy".
When the father related this story to me, I knew at once that I was talking to the head of a successful family. His son had perceived the object of true success - happiness.
It is true that we have to ensure good health, education, shelter and a sufficient amount of food, but success is not measured by material things. It is measured by the feeling of contentment, happiness and well-being that comes from the way you live.

Big  :hug:  :hug: to everyone
Sandi

Jellybelly Bears Jun 21, 2006

I've just read this whole thread and be warnd that I'm not feeling too well and my mind is a swirl of many swirls lol so hope this comes out right and I make sense, love your first quote Judi...I've never wanted to be anyone else either...just learning every day and hoping to become a better, more aware person as life deals its lessons...One bad experience leads me to protect myself next time, but also makes me more aware that next time I won't spend as much time on something negative or worrying aout something that doesnt really matter...prioroties change and straighten out as I grow and learn and that is good for me...does that make any sense at all lol Sucess to me is that, being a better person to myself and in what I've learned and how others know me as well, not in a money or how many or wonderful things you do sort of way, but a caring sensitive giving human...a good person..
Sick or not I would never change with anyone..that may sound sad or egotistical maybe, but I would hate to be someone else and not love as deeply or notice all the little good things in life...sucess is exactly what you say...being a better person one year to the next...be good to yourself and others, making sure you do both....no good being good to everyone and not to yourself...when they are not good to you, you have to be good to you, so there is give and take....(now does that make any sense lol..I really should stop writing tonight...House is on soon so will put everyone out of their misery soon I promise lol
xo a very muddled minded sarah

Laniebears Jun 21, 2006

A SOOOO TRUE QUOTE  :hug: JUDI  :hug:

:hug: HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER TODAY :hug:

Judi Jun 21, 2006

I think success is doing our best and striving for improvement and hopefully leaving our little corner of the world better than we found it - enriching others and ourselves along the path of this thing called "life".

Bear hugs, Edie

What an awesome way to look at success.

Maybe we should compile a list so whenever we are feeling down, or hurt by someone, or are feeling inadequate we can pull out the list and come back to what really matters.

Judi Jun 21, 2006

But there is oddles and oddles of love here. Yes, I would like to be more sucessful in certain parts of my life, but I guess all I really ever wanted was to be loved. I've got that, so everything else doesn't matter so much. Oh, and I'm happy. Never thought that would happen!

You are very rich Renea.  At the end of the day having someone love you and having someone to love back is the greatest gift of all.

When you are truely happy inside, it shows.     :hug:

Judi Jun 21, 2006

...just learning every day and hoping to become a better, more aware person as life deals its lessons...One bad experience leads me to protect myself next time, but also makes me more aware that next time I won't spend as much time on something negative or worrying aout something that doesnt really matter...prioroties change and straighten out as I grow and learn and that is good for me...does that make any sense at all lol Sucess to me is that, being a better person to myself and in what I've learned and how others know me as well, not in a money or how many or wonderful things you do sort of way, but a caring sensitive giving human...a good person..

Your mind if not muddled at all Sarah, infact I think you have great wisdom.  So do so many of you here. :hug:  :clap:  :clap:  :clap:  :clap:  :clap:

Judi Jun 21, 2006

\
Dr. Wayne is right. Competition with yourself is the only kind that's truly satisfying, and though the work and success of others can be inspiring and motivating, it's not the most accurate measure of our own success.

There are those who equate  success with sales, or fame, or some combination of the two. Maybe, but so far as I can see, the long-lasting version of this kind of success comes to those who peristed in developing their own visions.

And yet another wise person on this board.  You guys are blowing me away!  :dance:  :clap:  :clap:  :clap:  :clap:  :clap:  :clap:

Judi Jun 21, 2006

It is true that we have to ensure good health, education, shelter and a sufficient amount of food, but success is not measured by material things. It is measured by the feeling of contentment, happiness and well-being that comes from the way you live.

So true Sandi.

Another thing I have learned is that you just cannot control the actions of another.  There is a hymn called, " The Prayer of St. Francis."  The first line reads, " Make me a channel of your peace"....Dr WD talks about these words in that the monk who wrote this was not asking God for peace in his life but rather to make him a channel[vehicle] of His peace...allowing himself to be peaceful and live with peace and kindeness towards others.  Very powerful words.

thumperantiques Jun 21, 2006

Judi,
    The statement "you cannot control the actions of others" is soooo important.  When my daughter was in her early twenties, we had a bit of a rough spot in our relationship.  I had a hard time accepting that she was really old enough to make all of her own decisions, whether I liked them or not.  My sister gave me a book called Control Theory by William Glasser and it's an incredible book - it changed our relationship.  It really focused on "you can't control what other people think or do, you can only control your reactions to it."
I quickly learned to let go, and it really freed me.  I developed a new policy in our realtionship which stands even today - "I don't want to know the details of your private life unless you ask for my opinion, and if you do, then I am entitled to say exactly what I think".  It changed our relationship and we are very close now.   Even now, when she asks me for advice, we laugh because I alway say "are you sure you want to know? LOL!  I also love Dr. WD.  He is so in tune with life. 

      I would have to say that's the second most important thing I have learned in this journey called life. The first is that our children are born with inate presonalities already in tact, and we do not get a clean slate to program how we choose.  Makes life interesting, doesn't it.   I hope today is a better day for you - I'm sending hugs from Canada.

                                                       big hugs,  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:  :hug:

                                                       Brenda

Judi Jun 22, 2006

Brenda, It is amazing what we can learn from each other here.  What you say is enormous.

I have always thought they should teach in school classes about human nature, tolerance, and really understanding how to deal with other human beings.  English, math, science...yes those are all important but the most important is how we all co exisit, accept, take care of, and understand one another.  We sure aren't born knowing how to do this.

Dr Wayne Dyer changed my life after I lost my three family member in 2004.  He is so in tune wit life as you said.  What he says in his "The Power of Intention" dvd  brought me out of a dismal place and has taught me how live with peace.  I highly recommend it to everyone.

Judi Jun 22, 2006

This image of a kitten looking into the mirror was on the front of a card that I sent my sister just two weeks before she was killed.  The inside read:

What matters most is how you see yourself. 

This is one of the most powerful images I have seen.

psichick78 Jun 22, 2006

Aww Judi, it's ok to just feel down sometimes. It's all part of being human I guess. Sounds like you have lots of wisdom to help cope.

Helena, your story brought tears to my eyes. If only that innocence lasted forever. What a sweet girl you have.

Brendaas someone who is deciding to have kids, that advice really hits home. As my boyfriend and I talk about how we would parent etc. i have to admit I do kinda think I could mould a personality. A good one I would hope! But now that i think of it, my parents couldn't do that to me..........Great advice.....thank you.

thumperantiques Jun 22, 2006

Judi,
     I agree with you 100% that schools should concentrate as much on teaching tolerance,  and interacting with others properly as well as all academic subjects.  These values are just not being taught to children today for the most part.  Some parents do a good job, but for the ones that don't get it at home, it should be part of their daily instruction from the earliest grades.  It would help so much with the bullying that goes on in the schools, as well.
     I have seen Dr. WD's Power of Intention on PBS a number of times.  He has an incredible gift of being able to reach people, and is a powerful speaker.   I love to listen to him - he really makes you think.   I just caught the last half of his newest talk on Inspiration and can't wait to see it again.  I'm glad he was able to help you find some peace, after the horrible deaths of your family members.  Than it itself is a gift.
     I also wanted to thank you for posting the picture of the kitten and the lion in the mirror.  From the first time I saw it, it made such an impact on me.  I printed it off and have it in my studio. 

Heather,  when you have children, especially if the baby is strong willed as you say you are - well, sweetie, my money is on the baby LOL!   Our son ruled the house from the day he was born - man was he stubborn AND never slept a full night until he was in school full time, (and then only sporadically)!  As an adult, we have tons in common - he is artistic, has ADD, loves travelling and photography, is a free spirit and a nightowl - all characteristics of my family.  In fact, he is turning out to be a clone of my dad.  It really is fun to watch how genetics play in your kids! 

Renae, I'm sure you have had similar experiences with your daughter - lots of fun, eh!

                                                       hugs,

                                                       Brenda

Judi Jun 23, 2006

I also wanted to thank you for posting the picture of the kitten and the lion in the mirror.  From the first time I saw it, it made such an impact on me.  I printed it off and have it in my studio.

Oh I am so glad to hear that, Brenda.  I too have this image up where I can see it regularly.  It never hurts to have little reminders here and there.