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MerBear MerBear Originals
Brockville, Ontario
Posts: 1,540

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force.' It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

dusty attic dusty attic bears
somerset
Posts: 968

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup: really like number 8 and 10,Great. :crackup:  :crackup:

makafelts Charlotte Des Roches Designs
Adkins, Texas
Posts: 1,543

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup: These are great!!! :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

Hugs &

Michelle Helen Chaska, Minnesota
Posts: 2,897

Marion: this is very funny.  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

SueAnn Past Time Bears
Double Oak, Texas
Posts: 21,912

SueAnn Help Advisor, Banner Sponsor

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

DebbieD Posts: 3,540

:crackup:  :crackup:  Oh man, I SOOOO needed that!!  Thank you  for the laughter! :hug:

KatieBears Posts: 4

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

matilda Matilda Huggington-beare
WA
Posts: 5,551

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  I thought this was going tobe another lot of 'positive' drivle.
But this was sooooooooooooooooo much better!!!! :crackup:  :crackup:
I particularly liked 9, 13 and 22  bear_thumb

BootButtonBears BootButtonBears
Adelaide
Posts: 2,837
Website

Great advice to live by - and I'm serious!!!!

Carolyn Green Draffin Bears
Auckland New Zealand
Posts: 5,354
Website

They are great  bear_thumb  Thank you
  bear_grin

Hugs
Carolyn
bear_flower

valewoodbears Valewood Bears
Yorkshire
Posts: 6,537
Website

Really funny stuff  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

Pauline

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