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Oh I wanted to be a school teacher, every day I would come home, and play school.
I would place all the books around my bed, that was the classroom, then I had my blackboard and I would teach.
The nawty books (children) got smacked with a big stick I had. No wonder I am still growing up weird.
An actress /singer would also have been fun too, and I did dance and sing while in school at school plays.
When I started work, I did none of the above, but turned to Accountancy, so became a bean counter instead.
Lynette
Burlison BearsOh, Daphne! Your post made me cry! 
So sorry to hear that.
Actually, my husband and I are planning on adopting children from Russia within a couple years. We've been planning it for the last few years and are so looking forward to it. We've already had people (some family and friends) say not-so-nice things about that so we know we will have problems with certain people not accepting our young ones. That's sad but it's really their problem, not mine. I actually feel sorry for them, not being able to understand the love for a child...any child. My husband and I won't be swayed by their ignorant opinions.
Lots of love to you Daphne. :hug:
-Eliza
It is lovely to be a mother -- biological, adoptive, foster, and yes, also pet mommy. It's also a busload of hard work and sometimes, a totally thankless task.
I'm sure that I'd feel that same void Daphne and others have referenced if I hadn't had the opportunity to do what my heart wanted for so long, so I feel deeply for those of you who, for whatever reason, yearn for motherhood but haven't seen it happen for you. I wish there were some way to remedy that. If there were, I'd be that remedy, I'd find that remedy, I'd share that remedy, knowing first hand how motherhood has grown my person and enriched my life. To those of you who hurt over this issue... I'm sending you my love and understanding, my empahty, and many, many sisterly hugs.
Motherhood (parenting, actually) isn't without difficulties, though; sometimes, really challenging, heartbreaking ones. All of my best college friends have children, and between us, even in just this small handful of women and children, we deal with: childhood apraxia of speech; autism; eating disorders; OCD/Tourette's; and foreign adoption issues surrounding our offspring.
My sister and her husband chose long ago not to have children at all. I respect and understand their decision completely, without judgement. It's not for everyone. It was for me. I'm so sad for those who want it, but can't make it happen. I'm so happy for those who don't want it, and take pains to make sure it doesn't happen for them.
If anyone is interested, one of my oldest, dearest friends, Kristi, adopted twin girls from China a while back and has documented that entire (grueling) process in her regularly updated blog, "and babies make four." Read about her incredible journey into adoptive motherhood here: http://www.tolman.citymaker.com/page/page/1730889.htm Kristi's blog is unusual, in that it begins at top with the oldest entries and ends at bottom with the newest. If you're interested in seeing what's she's doing this week, scroll down. She's actually in California -- but far from me -- with one of my other oldest, dearest friends, Cara. I'm jealous and was invited, but just couldn't get away this week to join them; it's the last week of school for my sons!
Storytime BearsI really do think that there are other ways to mother without having children, I firmly and completely believe pets fill our lives and we can love them too. My dad is at a loss since my mom passed away in November and he is so lonely it is painful to watch, he loves animals so much I kept trying to convince him to get a dog. I would not know what to do without my Chihuahua, she makes me smile every single day.
You can mother your spouse, friends, nieces and nephews or even the neighbors kids. When I was growing up we had an older couple who were our neighbors and they were wonderful, they did not have children of their own but they were loved by everyone in the neighborhood , they passed away within a year of each other. They had people at their house all the time and I don't think biology played a part in them loving or being loved.
What I don't understand is how some women that should not have kids have them and others that should have kids, don't.
I was in a checkout line this past weekend and there was a lady screaming at her very small child sitting in the cart, she had 2 others too, but she kept yelling " I said, shut up!!!!" "would you just shut up" then she got right in his face and said "I said shut the f*ck up" because he kept crying, he looked to be about 14 months. My heart broke for those kids. I went the manager to ask him to speak to her but before I could get one she was out the door. My question is, if she is willing to talk to her kids in public like that, what must she do in private.
I am sorry I know I got off the thread topic but it just makes me so mad to see kids treated this way. My sister in law that just found out she had breast cancer always wanted kids but was never able to, she is a WONDERFUL aunt to all her nieces and nephews, she would have been an amazing mother.
Burlison BearsOmigosh Jodi! I know what you mean. I see some bad mothers all the time shouting at and belittling their children right there in public. It makes me so sad. And I see tons of parents not caring to hold their toddler's hand while crossing a busy parking lot...and I've seen lots of close calls with cars about to hit the straying child. How irresponsible can you be!?
It is strange that the women who don't want children seem to be the ones who end up with kids. I have to say that my mother did not deserve to have my older sister and I. She was a very cruel abusive mother and she let us know that she never wanted us. I'm nothing like her. I so long to be a mother and I know I'll be a great one. I have so much love to give...and here I am giving it to baby squirrels I find in the yard! 
I hope everyone who longs for the love of a child has their need met in some way. Here's hugs for you all. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
-Eliza
I have to say that I have always wanted to be a mommy too since I was a little girl. Hopefully I will get my chance one day. I'm still only 23, and my husband and I have no plans to have children just yet, but they are certainly in our 'life plan'.
I have wanted to be various things growing up, including school teacher, librarian, the lead in a musical (but I can't sing!!!!!), fashion designer, doctor (but I pass out at the slightest suggestion of blood!!) and teacher of deaf children. After graduating from uni, I have ended up being a Sign Langauge Interpreter, but I'm still not sure it is what I want to do forever. I would love to be able to make bears full time, but I don't think it will happen any time soon. The advantage of being an interpreter is that I am self-employed, so if in the future my hubby and I are lucky enough to hear the pitter patter of tiny feet, I could still do a day or two a week of interpreting to give me something that is still 'mine'. It also means that currently I can take enough days of interpreting to pay the bills, and still have some days left to make my bears. A perfect arrangment really.
Back Road BearsSamantha - it sounds like you have the perfect working arrangements. There are many wonderful benefits to being self-employed!
Jodi & Eliza - It is when I see "unfit" mothers that I want to cry and scream and carry-on about how unfair the world is when there are those of us who are very "fit" yet can't have children and then here are these poor children who are living a horrific childhood. It's not right. Of course, me with my big mouth... I've told off mothers who have treated their children like the one you described, Jodi. Even got one woman arrested... the grandmother picked up the children, thankful the mother had finally been caught! (This incident happened in a store I was managing where I had a right to speak to the mother about her language and physical abuse - she was offending other shoppers and hurting my business as many left. She spoke to me even worse than she did her kids, of course, so I called the police.) What is WRONG with people? OK, don't answer that.
Cheryl & Eliza - I have 6 first cousins on my Dad's side who are all adopted... it's not something I ever really think about when we're all together... they are family and I love them whether we share the same blood or not. I gotta tell ya, I can think of some blood relatives I'd rather not be related to! Blood has nothing to do with it as far as I'm concerned... looks don't either. Family is about love, kindness, commitment.... I wish my in-laws felt that way! I guess the world is full of narrow-minded people, huh?
Jodi - Dogs, pets for that matter, are a good substitute... better than nothing... but no, not the same as having children of your own. Being involved in the lives of nieces, nephews, neighborhood kids, friend's kids, children at church, etc...... it's fun, rewarding even... but still not the same. There's a sense of pride, love, amazement even at raising your own child, working through the struggles, rejoicing in the triumphs, all the while knowing YOU are the one responsible for this little life as it grows and becomes it's own person. Being the one who he runs to when he falls at the playground and scrapes his knee; waiting up for her, biting your nails off, when she goes on her first date; crying at his graduation; standing up for her when she marries... being the one she calls when she's had her own baby and is in a panic and doesn't know what to do when it won't stop crying. And depending on him to help you find the care you need when you are elderly. To have a child in your life who is all these things to you yet not your own.... pretty rare!
(I hear you moms saying it's not all peaches and cream, Shelli has made that clear and I'm not naive.... parenthood has plenty of headaches, heartaches and gray hairs mixed in.... but I don't know one parent who would give it all up!)
But you know, in my case, if I did have kids and school and activities, etc. I wouldn't be able to pack my bags to run at the drop of a hat when my dad is rushed to the hospital, has surgery, etc. These last couple of years I've been very thankful that I don't have kids. But, I see how much my folks depend on me and wonder who on earth Henry and I will have!?
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I do have a dream of what I'd like to be when I grow up... one that has developed in recent years..... I'd like to own a 'fiber arts' shop specializing in high end fabrics, bear making supplies of course, wool, yarns and other fiber art supplies.... rug hooking, needlefelting, etc. There would be bright and spacious classrooms for workshops, art camp for kids... the list goes on. Attached to my Fiber Shop would be a cafe and book store. So those who have been 'dragged off' to the Fiber Shop with someone can sit and read a book or magazine over coffee while they wait. Kids would have a reading corner in the book shop as well as corner in the fiber shop to experiment with all sorts of art projects. Look me up in about 5 years.... I'll be hiring! 
Lemmon BearsI wanted to be an archeologist, the world traveling kind....like Indiana Joans 
Yep, the best thing is to be Mom. My baby is graduating high school Saturday!! I'm not ready for him to be grown up....it was just yesterday he was graduating kindergarten.
Joan
Storytime BearsDaphne, you were so meant to be a Mom, what you wrote is truly wonderful and right on target. Before I had my oldest I found out I had an ovarian tumor and I may not ever have children, we looked into adoption from other countries but my husbands father is a very unkind person and is just an out and out bigot, my husband was not completely into it because how his family woulfd be, and I felt that would be unfair to bring a child into that situation. Well by some miracle at 28 I got pregnant and it has been as you described. Then 10 yrs later we were blessed again with our youngest, he has a degree of autism, he has been a very big challenge, but oh such a joy. Every one of his successes are so much more wonderful. I really thought I would never have kids and I cherish every day, even the bad ones. They are both caring, loving people and I am so lucky to have them.
I get very upset and I too am mouthy when I see kids being abused, kids are hard work, why on earth would someone keep having kids if they don't enjoy them. One time I was waiting in line at a store, without my kids, and the couple behind me was screaming at their kid and kept hitting her and saying things like, "You wait until I get you out into the car" well I waited for them to get done I followed them to the parking lot, wrote down their license number and walked up very calmly and said "Hi I just wanted you to know I took your car plate number and I watched you abuse your daughter in that store, and at some point , and you will never know when , I am going to turn this info over to the childrens welfare dept and report what I have seen, you better hope it's not on a day you abuse your child because you will get your butt thrown in jail. So if I was you I would find a better way to parent your child." they stood and looked dumb founded. I would never do this when I have my kids with me, I always report it to a manager, you never know what someone would do.
Daphne Good for you on reporting that women, too many people don't want to get involved.
The one thing I would love to do,( but I am horrible in english), is be a children's author. I have a story that has been in my head for years, but I am so bad at grammer it would be awful if I ever tried to sit down and write it. The closest I will ever get is doing my Storytime thing on ebay.
Newcastle, OntarioIt's nice to see how many adopted children we have among us. My niece and her hubby adopted a brother and sister 8 years ago, when they were 2 1/2 and 4 1/2. They both have learning problems as well as ADD and health issues, but they are absolutely wonderful children and I can't imagine our family without them. They are getting the best education that is possible for them and all the love they could ever want. I truly think they were meant to be their children, no matter how it came about.
My niece actually had a dream about them and saw a picture of them in her dream, before they found them. When she saw their picture, it was the one in her dream - she absolutely knew they would be the ones to get to adopt them. It is uncanny how much they look like their adoptive parents, and they are always getting complimented on how much they look alike! I believe they are right where they are supposed to be.
My niece is sending updated pictures and progress reports to the natural parents through the adoption agency, so their location is not disclosed. I'm not sure I could do that, but she knows they were given up due to major health issues in the family, not neglect, and she thinks they deserve to now how they are doing. The children know they are adopted and that they will be able to see their natural parents as adults, if they wish.
As for me, I've always wanted to be a children's book illustrator - maybe someday. From the day I started school, all I ever wanted was to be at home, doing art. I couldn't tolerate the amount of people at school or the noise - I should have done correspondence LOL! So after 5 horrendous years working as a secretary, I've been able to dable in art, while raising our two children - I feel very lucky.
hugs,
Brenda
