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Posts: 2,203My brother is doing an essay on the things people do to each other on line. It has been my experience that on line sources like facebook and blogging have made people bold or just plain stupid. I have had things said to me and about me online that I know would never be said to my face. I have also found that communicating via social net work or email things can be misinterpeted. this happens because there is an absence of vocal tone or facial expression. What is your opinion on the matter?
The Littlest ThistleI think things can be misinterpreted, but I also think that there's a lot of people who say things online that they would never dare say in person! I can remember a friend on a photography site telling me a story of a very vocal member (who had moved on by the time I joined) that had strong opinions on all things photographic, making it seem like he had years of experience with thousands of pounds worth of equipment. He turned up to a 'meet' with a number of the members one day and it turned out that he was actually a teenager who wouldn't say boo to a goose in person and who had a small, bottom of the range camera.
I can also remember a whole hoo-ha that came up online after a scrapbooking magazine had to disqualify a contestant from its big annual competition. Creating Keepsakes did a Hall of Fame each year, where the 20 top scrappers that entered won a place in the Hall of Fame, and were called upon to produce a few things for articles throughout the year. It was seen as very prestigious, and people spent months creating entries for it. Each year there was a list of 'set pieces' and a list of 'competitor's choice pieces'. This particular year one of the set pieces was a layout about you. Unfortunately, whoever came up with the idea for that piece had obviously not liaised with the person writing all the rules, and there was a rule that stated that all photos had to be taken by you. One of the original winners, who was pretty much a shoe-in given all the things she had submitted for various articles in a number of magazines previously, phoned the magazine just before the hall of fame one went to print to say that the photos on her 'about you' page should be credited to her friend, another 'famous' scrapper, who used to write a lot of the photography columns in the magazine. Looking at the photos it should have been obvious to the judges that she couldn't have taken them herself, since the pictures were of her white water rafting! The magazine did themselves no favours since they vacilated about disqualifying her after it was brought to their attention that this contravened the rules, however the story took off like wildfire across the scrapping internet world. EVERYONE had an opinion, and the scrapping world was polarised into the 'young and trendy' and the 'fat, middle-aged housewife' the latter of which was supposedly insanely jealous of the former. The woman in question, a 'young and trendy' who also did herself no favours in how she tried to defend herself, ended up with stalkers, having to take her blog offline, changing her e-mail address, and finding herself face to face with enraged women at the restaurant that she and her husband ran in New York. The whole thing was utterly insane, and eventually made some of the national papers in the US, but it was entirely driven by the internet, and people's ability to say exactly what they felt in a 'no holds barred' situation.
Hope that helped a bit!
Posts: 112Oh yes! People say the most outrageous things to each other and I'm sure they would never say them to the person's face. I've never been personally insulted but I'm an oldie, so maybe we oldies have a little more decorum and courtesy.
Parker BearsI have to agree some people feel they have the right to say whatever they like and put it out there for all to read and put their own interpretation on( regardless of how it affects the other person) because they don't have to face you personally.
I have had my work slated online by a few people who don't like my more out there bears. I accept this is there opinion and I don't expect everyone to like my more "out of the square" creations( they are definitely an acquired taste) but not one of them has had the gumption to voice their rather strong opinions to me personally.
Even though I take this with a grain of salt and don't let it get to me(It is after all only only few peoples opinions and I think if you are going to make sometimes controvercial creations you have to have thick skin) I feel that the no real consequences to having your say on line has allowed them to say things that they would not normally say to you or about you face to face.
Feeling better now after venting!!!
Cheers Lyn
Benson BearsAwwwww Lynn! I know you, and I know your sense of humour and I do know that your "out theres" won't appeal to many and it's a very good thing that you have a very thick hide! Because I know that you will keep making your creations, be they cute or "unusual". I guess this ol' internet opens us up to a whole world we wouldn't otherwise know, and there will be positives and ALOT of negatives.......as with all things. I know you accept that some of what you do will not be acceptable to some, but I for one appreciates your daring and your humour.......Love to you x x x
this year i had a pain! my best friends was playing my role on facebook to have new boyfriends she made on fotos of me and talking as if it was me i felt so munch betrayed!!!!now i dont see her anymore :we were friends for 25 years ago! i knew her true personnality ........she said she was dying of jalousie from all those years ! i didnt understood anything........ 
Newcastle, OntarioMy son made a comment on line, a few years ago, that I stumbled across and I was really upset with him. He said it was meant as a joke and he does have a witty, sarcastic side to his personality, but that's where the internet is so tricky. Not everyone would know that about him and it could seem really rude to others. We got into a heated argument and I told him I thought I had done a better job of raising him. Eventually, he came around to see my side of things and sincerely apologized. I do think he is more careful about what he "puts into public view", now. 
Janet, I think you are right - those of us from the "older" generation are more cautious about what we write - this is all new to us. I don't feel comfortable putting a lot of things on the internet and basically, my private life is "private". Young people, including my kids, think it's acceptable to put things online on Facebook, that I would never dream of doing. I guess it's our "generation gap"
Just for a bit of positve - I love forums and I love Facebook. There are a lot of people that I consider myself to be close with on the internet, that I just would not have met if it were not for the internet. Some of them I have gone on to meet in person and have formed very firm friendships with. There are other people that I have known for a long time but live a long way away from that I have been able to remain close to because of the internet.
I'm not sure that the situation that Katy outlined would have been any different if it had not been for the internet. Having been on many committees and a member of many clubs, groups etc., I would not say that they were any different in person to what they are on the internet. If someone wants to cause trouble they will, whether it be on the internet or anywhere else.
Gossip has been a part of life since time began and some people have always been inclined to talk about others. Others perhaps have been more inclined to have been talked about! The thing I absolutely love about internet chats is that you get to know the person before you see them. That way, you are really getting to the heart of them, and are not making value judgements on how they have their hair, how they are dressed, and what their accent is.
Of course there can be misunderstandings, but that's life.
I don't know really whether it is an age thing or not - I do know that my friends are in a much wider age range since I started using the internet. I am 55 and more than a bit addicted to Facebook!
Posts: 2,203Me too dawn!
I am with you Dawn, I have found people just as plain spoken to my face as they are on the net which is great, I would always rather plain speaking whatever the medium and I am always happy to say it how I see it!!!
The one and only thing that I have found has caused problems on the net rather than anywhere else apart maybe from the old fashioned letter is that inflection and tone can't be heard in email or on forums and often misunderstandings arise from that.
xxx
Boechout, AntwerpI am also with Dawn on this one and I think she makes a very good point when she writes :
The thing I absolutely love about internet chats is that you get to know the person before you see them. That way, you are really getting to the heart of them, and are not making value judgements on how they have their hair, how they are dressed, and what their accent is.
:clap:
I have gotten to know several people this way and, so far, when I met them in person, they have never disappointed me. 
In my opinion, the people who are honest, considerate and reasonable in their comments on forums or TT or whichever internet medium, turn out to be exactly the same in real life. I just avoid the people who are abusive, judgmental or fanatic, because I do not believe that they will turn out to be wonderful people in real life.
Moreover, not having been at the front of the queue myself when they gave out the good looks :crackup: , I consider it a big advantage that people like me for my ideas, personality, etc... instead of my looks (it sounds corny but it's true). 
Hugs, :hug:
Peter & the bears
Teacup TeddiesI agree that the mask of the inet can make people bold (and a bit rude), but I'd like to share with you the nice experiences I've had. I sell jewellery and accessories on Etsy and eBay (long before I picked up any mohair) and I've met some lovely women who have been more 'open' than they would be had we met face to face. I recently sold some items to a lady in America who is quite unwell and we began chatting. She is lovely and really sweet and we have both been really open about our similar experiences in our conversations. I don't think I could have said these things in person, and I think that sometimes the distance created by the inet allows us the security we need to say (well, write) things we wouldn't otherwise speak about. Do you think the inet can be therapuetic in this way?
Xx
Teacup TeddiesI am also with Dawn on this one and I think she makes a very good point when she writes :
Dawn J wrote:The thing I absolutely love about internet chats is that you get to know the person before you see them. That way, you are really getting to the heart of them, and are not making value judgements on how they have their hair, how they are dressed, and what their accent is.
:clap:
I have gotten to know several people this way and, so far, when I met them in person, they have never disappointed me.
In my opinion, the people who are honest, considerate and reasonable in their comments on forums or TT or whichever internet medium, turn out to be exactly the same in real life. I just avoid the people who are abusive, judgmental or fanatic, because I do not believe that they will turn out to be wonderful people in real life.Moreover, not having been at the front of the queue myself when they gave out the good looks :crackup: , I consider it a big advantage that people like me for my ideas, personality, etc... instead of my looks (it sounds corny but it's true).
Hugs, :hug:
Peter & the bears
This is a wonderful post, it actually reminded me that I forgot to mention- I met my husband over the Internet!!
yes !!beautifull !and infortunaly for me it had made me discover the real face of my best friend:a fake... so i had not to be mistaken or betrayed now: we have to see the best way for all problems they make us grown up!!!!!! :pray:
