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Francesca Jul 8, 2012

Correct me if I'm wrong, but knowing that there are 'good conduct' rules should encourage to take part in debates. Those rules should only stop people that don't wish, or are not able, to express their point of view without being rude or slipping into fights. It is only logical that those rules exist, and even the shy ones that fear of  being caught in the middle can feel 'safe' and express their point of view. On the other side, people that are very forthcoming, and sometimes too forceful, can have their say if they keep in mind that not everything is permitted.

What attracted me to this site was primarily the feeling that it was full of very friendly people, wishing to share their own experience about the teddy bear world, wishing to connect to people that shared the same passion. I wouldn't have felt the same, had I seen such brawls as you are describing. I surely wouldn't have joined in any conversation. What makes this site a wonderful place to come back day after day is that you feel you are visiting a community of friends that share the same passion. I'm not such an ingenuous as to think that everybody must always agree on every issue, it is real life and people differ sometimes. But there also is a way to differ without hurting and insulting. And personally, I like it this way.

Geralye Jul 8, 2012

I'm guilty of not dropping in of late, but then I never did join in too much with discussions - being an amateur I didn't always feel I had anything constructive to add.  I loved checking the cute pic of the day, but I never seem to have the time these days.  My job now takes a lot of my time and my elderly mother seems to need more attention so it gets harder.

cheers,
G

rkr4cds Jul 8, 2012

Thank You Becky, I too liked this topic.
I've ALWAYS thought that any group is only as active as it's owner/moderators. This is not to place the whole load on SueAnn's shoulders, who is doing a TREMENDOUS job on her own, along with Quy. But when there were another 4 or 5 Help Advisors adding their own comments almost daily to the topics it certainly kept the conversations moving along and the forum was a lively place.

One important thing that Heidi points out is her age: it struck me that we are all 'ageless' here! Unless she had said that she'd just graduated from HS, no one would attribute a particular age to her.. or anyone else: we all just become teddy lovers here, whether we're 18 or 88! I think that's very unusual these days and just grand!!

2 users like this: peterbear, Rainebears

jenny Jul 8, 2012

I agree that the forum is the result of much hard work by all the people who keep it going and I hope you all don't think I was mourning the firey topics. Is hate that flaming and think its best to be sensitive and respectful . I think a good debate is stimulating and interesting though and love to talk about our craft with like minded people.

1 user likes this: Francesca

tcfolk Jul 9, 2012

I just got back from a 5 day holiday and found this wonderful thread!  I must say, that although I have only been active on TT for a year, I have been dropping in for about 6.  It was always a wonderful, knowledgeable place for people who love bears!  I have noticed a decline and agree that many are going to other forms of social media.  I have not and will not ever be on FB.  It is not my cup of tea.  But I must say that one of the reasons I do enjoy this forum is the absence of rudeness and hostility.  Turn on the TV about any time any where and we are bombarded with an abundance of it!  I have been to other sites that have people calling each other names, telling each other how stupid they are and even a bit of foul language thrown in because someone has a different opinion.  Of course we need different opinions!  How dull the world would be if we all thought alike.  But everyone deserves to be treated with respect, even when they are disagreeing!  All that having been said, I do confess that there are times I don't respond to a thread because I have an unconventional opinion or a way of doing something and don't want to offend or be ignored!  As to fixing the "problem", I feel we must each do our bit to contribute: log on when you visit (it only takes a second longer, and I'm guilty of not always logging in), offer help without fear of reprisal when you see a thread that interests you, offer a different opinion or procedure being cognizant of others feelings, acknowledge each others contributions, start up a thread about nothing or ask that question you've felt people would find "stupid", but above all, just participate!  Okay, I'm putting my soap box away now, but I promise I will do better! 

3 users like this: FenBeary Folk, Francesca, peterbear

DENBY30 Jul 9, 2012

WOW so glad I stopped by today, love this chit chat, I too miss the ole days even tho I am mostly a visitor.  I make bears but rarely post as don't know how to.  I loved the bear swaps, the virtual vacation with all the post cards, I guess no one wanted to do that this year.  Then valentines day there were only 2 of us, I love the ornament swap, I guess we all get so caught up in our own lives that we forget what a great place TT is.  I do stop in almost every day.  But not as much lately as it has kind of become dull.  I do see a lot of TT'rs on FB, but this still is the place to be, to learn and to communicate about bears in particular.  I am so glad to be a part of it, I have met so many wonderful friends here and hope we can keep it going.
Hugs Pat

FenBeary Folk Jul 10, 2012

Just a quick post from me, as lunchtime was just over when I found this, so sorry if it's been said

I joined TT 5 years ago and .............I am going to be very honest now and risk being slapped  :cry:

I stopped posting then stopped visiting when time and time again I was "put down" I would not point fingers and do not believe that those who did are still here, which is why I have started to visit again

This site was great but became a victim of it's own success, maybe a new era is dawning when people will return. I am sure they will return because FB is going the same way, petty squables, name calling etc

Sorry if I have offended but I always try to be truthful 

rowarrior Jul 10, 2012

Hmm, I'm not making bears these days other than commissions.  I was finding it totally disheartening to make bears that were time and again passed over at fairs (and if you can explain how at one point 3 different sets of people can be fighting over a bear and yet none of them bought it, I'd be grateful!).  I'd been approached by several shops, but I also have a full time job, so at that point they weren't interested either. 

I suppose when I stopped making them so much, I stopped commenting on the other bears and things, although I do still check the general section daily.  I think with the technique section I got rather irritated with people demanding answers to things who also didn't have the common courtesy to acknowledge or thank people who had contributed - you may not agree with everyone's ideas, but if they take the time to write out an answer for you, the least you can do is thank them for their time.  Sorry, climbing off my manners soapbox now!

jenny Jul 10, 2012

Sue,  I hear what you are saying ...that aspect is a problem feature of lots of forums. There are those who use the relative safety of sitting behind a screen to be opinionated ,arrogant and disparaging to others...when in reality they would never say boo to a goose and it's very upsetting if you are on the receiving end. We can all be brave and clever when nobody even knows what we look like! The techniques thing is the area I feel used to get a fair bit of that. You might suggest a method that works for you only to have someone infer that it's wrong. But hey , if it works for you and you are sharing it I think that is very giving. But things move on and people change. I think it's good to be open minded.
But I agree about those who don't respond after you took time out to offer advice ...it's just about manners.

1 user likes this: FenBeary Folk

Pijangibears Jul 10, 2012

Now, I want to make my comment - I have been with TT for 7 years, so I have followed the old TT, too. If I shall tell it from my point of wiew,
as a foreigner, it wasn't great to be here, it was a US club. It was great, if you was from US, but if you came from another counthy, your words didn't count.
I have been furstrated a lot of times - when I make a post, the US members just talk without seeing my posts - I was invisible. Many of my posts were unaswered.
In the end, I didn't want to make any comments at all, because it hurts, when no one see the comment at all.
I am looking in everyday at TT - with my login, but only to see, I am the only one. And no new posts - it is so sad.
Sorry, but it was what I was feeling, when I was in the old TT - Not as happy as you want it to look.

2 users like this: FenBeary Folk, jenny

FenBeary Folk Jul 10, 2012

Jenny, I think you are right it is a problem on ALL forums, a core few seem to be determined to spoil for a fight.

Maybe the forums will naturally rotate in popularity and those that feel ignored or are bullied will gravitate to another forum, then moving on again when the bullies catch up. I do love a good debate but you can do it without it getting personal

Brigitte, I have to say I agree, at times I felt very ignored. It did feel like a giant US club................maybe that was because they had an affinity together, fellow countrymen etc and other nationalities are not as represented but as with Jenny's point I think a core few seemed to make it their business to either ignore or dominate depending on how they felt, you were not alone in your feelings

I would like to think that TT was moving into a new phrase, just don't tell the dominators 

Pijangibears Jul 10, 2012

I am happy, I'm not alone with my opinion, thank you.

FenBeary Folk Jul 10, 2012

Birgitte, sorry I spelt your name wrong......................my pc threw a wobbler and I lost your post completely, really strange :lol:

PS it won't let me like your post either x

Pijangibears Jul 10, 2012

Do you have my post now?

Pijangibears Jul 10, 2012

It is okay with the spelling - I think Brigitte is a very nice name 

FenBeary Folk Jul 10, 2012

I have your post now and have been able to like it

I think you were brave to raise this point  it's is what a lot of us have felt 

Pijangibears Jul 10, 2012

I am so happy, that i 'm not alone with the feeling of TT, but it is sad, that it has to be so 

thumperantiques Jul 11, 2012

Sue and Birgitte, I'm sorry to hear that you felt it was a US club.  I'm Canadian, but I did shows for several years in the U.S. and met a lot of U.S. artists, so I have always felt comfortable here.  My biggest aversion was the discussions that would suddenly turn very nasty and always ending up with someone leaving.    I love a good debate but have absolutely no tolerance for the horrid comments that were being tossed back and forth, especially when it was quite evident that people were opening up additonal memberships under new names, just so they could be hurtful anonymously. I think anyone registering here should have to put in enough personal details to curtail that sort of thing.  I too check Teddy-talk frequently and found it disappointing to see the forums reduced to very few topics.  It would be really nice to see it lively again.

1 user likes this: jenny

FenBeary Folk Jul 11, 2012

Hi Brenda......................I think it felt US just because the percentage of US bear makers on here far outweighs the rest of us. 99% of the US bear makers are lovely, so kind and helpful and I am sure there were a few non US makers who added to unhappiness on here

I must have left by the time it got serious and I am really happy that Admin toughened the rules. I didn't realise people were joining under false names, how bad is that

Maybe if we make an effort TT will become more lively again. I for one am more confident in myself now compared to when I left.

Sue Ann...............hats off to you for being the only admin 

Sorry still haven't had time to read the rest of the thread but will do 

1 user likes this: tcfolk

desertmountainbear Jul 11, 2012

Pijangibears, and anyone else who has seen this as a US club forum.  I am sorry, I never realized.  When I comment I never look to see where the commenter is coming from. 

I used to come here and comment on all the bears everyday.  I am afraid that I do not do that anymore.  It is sad, but Facebook has ruined that for me here.  I still go to FB daily and I like or comment on so many bears there that I just can not look anymore.  It is just easier to do it there.  I know that I said it before, but I do think FB has much to do with the demise of this site.

2 users like this: jenny, SharonKing

binglebears Jul 13, 2012

I know that I stepped out of TT after watching some of the flaming.  However, I was also having a flare-up of health problems and just didn't have the energy to sit at the computer very long.  I, like many of you, find Facebook overwhelming.  I just go there, wish people "happy birthday," and then move onto another site.  My energy is picking up and I must admit that I miss TT, so I think I will start checking it again every day.

Warmly,
Cheryl

SharonKing Jul 13, 2012

So sorry you feel that way Joanne.. I feel lucky and blessed to have found you on this site!! And although I don't comment often,, I do enjoy checking around.. I bet there are other's out there like me... which doesn't do you much good if you don't know someone admires you and your work... Hoping this site comes back up to the standards it once was... Hope you know that you are valued.  Sharon <><

Lhearn Jul 13, 2012

I liked it the way it use to be to. It seems that over time that things change. I guess that is a part of life.

Pijangibears Jul 13, 2012

It is so nice to see the changing allready, it is beginning to be alive again  :love:
Do you all feel it.
I think, we all trying to make an effort to make it like the old days, whit lots of activities.

3 users like this: dangerbears, peterbear, tcfolk

dangerbears Jul 13, 2012

It is so nice to see the changing allready, it is beginning to be alive again

You're so right! I'm really enjoying all of the posts, everybody!

Becky

1 user likes this: Pijangibears