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My sister and I did something for our parents today, and I am scared to answer my phone not knowing what their reaction will be. To make a long story short, my Dad was just "laid off" (a nice way of saying gotten rid of.. 
) his job of 38 years. Funny how he was the only one laid off when so many of the young guys have been there for such a short time. He has been considered antiquated and behind the young guys in training, etc for a while now. Experience doesn't count for as much as it should! Anyway, he's 58 years old with no higher education and finding another job is so hard for him. Unemployment takes 3 weeks to start and my Mom is disabled. They are in a serious financial situation right now as they were barely making it as it was. My sister and I have been trying for a couple of weeks to get them to accept some help from us and of course, they refused adamantly. They are both so proud and don't take help from anyone. They don't think it's right to take money from their kids. Well........Laurie and I got together and each came up with $500, and each wrote a letter to our parents, and then put it all in a mushy card. This afternoon I smuggled the lot of it into their house and put it next to Mom's pain medication in the medicine cabinet--where I know she'll find it soon. It's killing me waiting to see if they're mad or not!! I love them both so much!
My parents could sure use any extra prayers that can be sent their way. I can't stand seeing them like this! My Dad is so depressed and I think feeling like he's been thrown away, and Mom is worrying herself sick about the finances. Dad's looking for another job, but so far no luck. I am so worried..... 
,
Tracy
Oh Tracy! You have such a kind heart. Hopefully your parents will see that you and your sister are only trying to help. Pride gets in the way too often, I think. Family is about caring and sharing and helping each other. I'll say a bushel of prayers for your mum and dad and I just know other TT'ers will too.
Warmest bear hugs, :hug:
Aleta
P.S. I would have done the same. If they resist, tell them to think of it as a loan they can repay when they get back on their feet. Sometimes it takes a spoon full of sugar. 
Apple Dumpling DesignsI understand more than you know. I had something similar happen to me and I was in a position to help my parents for some time. My mom finally gave in and we kept it secret for a couple years from my dad and by the time he found out he wasn't mad in fact he was very grateful.
That's what kids are for...to help when our parents need it.
Huge hugs and lots of prayers,
Shantell
Thanks so much for the kind support and prayers. 
I really needed to share this with someone today! I know we did the right thing, but I don't want to upset my parents either. I told them in my letter that I wouldn't be much of a daughter if I stood back and did nothing to help when I know that things are so bad right now. I really believe that, and I can be just as stubborn as they are if need be!!
:hug:
Tracy
Posts: 8,574So sorry to hear about your father's dillema. Our countries economic base is erroding because of behaviour like this. It is cheaper to keep the younger ones, demographically they are sick less often etc...
Pretty soon they will start calling steady full time work and entitlement program.
AND YET they want to raise the retirement age to 75.
Makes a lot of sense huh?
I am glad if you can help your folks out. Yes, I understand....us older folks have this cockamammie idea that we shouldn't take anything from the kids, we should be giving to them.....hungry dear?
Yikes....I think it is genetically encoded.
But if they can accept your sister's and your gesture it will actually bless all four of you. And that is a win win situation.
I am so sorry for your father. This has got to hurt him on so many levels. And yes, your dear parents are in my prayers, as are you and your sister, for the understanding and support you will need to be.
:hug: :hug:
dilu
Donna's Duin BruinsTracy,
What a wonderful gesture, you will reap rewards for this! One thing our family did in the past was to pay bills like gas and electricity. We were in a small town so the pharmacist let us put money towards drugs that were not covered by medicare. Food managed to make its way into the refrigerator and cupboards. It won't be anger, it will be embarrassment. You just keep doing what you can and don't worry. Do you have any friends that know of jobs for Dad? Hang tough, you will all come out on the other side of this problem stronger people!
Donna
I only hope my kids are as kind-hearted and loving if and when I ever find myself in similar straits.
You're an absolute gem; your parents may feel lots of things, but two of them will certainly be, "TOUCHED" and "PROUD."
:hug:
Just Us BearsTracy,
If it comes to it, remind your folks of how much money they put into bringing you up, education, clothes, non-necessities that we just had to have as teens. Help them see you are just giving a little bit back of what they gave you. 
I totally understand where your dad is at...my dad was tossed on the rubbish heap at the same age and it did do terrible things to his self esteem. Years later though, he sees it was a blessing. His work was hard and stressful and he is now quite an accomplished author, having published two books and working on a third. This never would have come about if not for his redundancy. Maybe your dad can try to look at what he'd really like to do and consider semi-retirement...just get a part time job or something? There's no easy answer and unfortunately with our menfolk, often their work is their identity.
I think Donna's suggestion is also a great one re paying some of the bills and definitely putting some food in the fridge or even a casserole here and there.
Your parents are so lucky to have such caring kids.
Tracy, so sorry to hear of your Dad being laid off and how very hard it must be for all
the family.
How wonderful that you and your sister did what you did!
I am sure that they will really appreciate the help and that is what life is all about
isn't it ... caring and sharing.
Kindest thoughts and prayers to your Family and I really wish your Dad well,
hope that he will get work.
Hugs
Carolyn
:dance: :dance: :dance: :dance: :dance:
Mission accomplished!!!................At least half way anyway. I got a call from Mom, and did get 'chewed' a bit, but only because we made her cry. I could tell she had been. She said she read our letters and just started bawling like a baby. Dad thought something was really wrong with her! Anyway, she did thank me for what we did, but said the money was going in their safe box at home and they weren't touching it unless they absolutely had to...and that we would get it back if they don't spend it. I just know they will try like mad to not use any of it, but at least they didn't try to give it back or something.
What a relief! The waiting for their reaction was just killing me as this is so important to me for so many reasons. Thanks everyone for the wonderful support and encouragement and prayers. It means a lot to me!
:hug:
Tracy
Past Time BearsOh wow . . . what a very touching AND touchy issue here! So glad your parents were able to accept your financial help without too much of a hassle. My hubs was "retired" early . . . at 59, so I know how it feels. His company, however, had some fairly good benefits, so we aren't in dire straits. We both started drawing our Social Security at 60 and that helped, too. We did the unemployment deal until it ran out, so just try to find ways of 'making do' until help arrives. Did your dad's former employer have any benefits for their workers that they 'cut loose'? Paul (my hubby) has found some temporary teaching jobs and I try to supplement as much as I can with Past Time Bears. We really have to watch the budget but, fortunately, are not going hungry. Our kids would never be able to support us if the circumstances were different. You and your sister are wonderful children and your parents are very lucky. I agree that paying some of their bills and providing food will help tons. Good luck to them and my thoughts will be with you.
Sophie Z'Ours:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
Well done Tracy! Your sister and you did the right thing! Finger crossed your dad will quickly find a new job! In france too, finding a job for people over 50 years old, it is very very hard. For younger people it is hard too...
Maybe you should get your parents into teddy bear making!!! 
and make a family business!
Sorry to joke about that, but life is so unfair it is good to smile sometimes! I am myself unemployed, and this is driving me crazy sometimes: what was the point of making so long studies, getting a nice PhD diploma, if that was to become unemployed after only a one-year contract? Compared to your dad, i am still very young, and will eventually find a job. For eldest people, the problem is employers do prefer youngers for many reasons, like old people may get retired after just a few years, or can get ill, etc, so would not be a good investment!!! how odd! they always forget that older people have many years of experience and could be very helpful!
I really hope that things will get better soon for your parents and will cross my fingers for them.
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
Take care, Tracy!
Beary hugs,
Sophie.
Newcastle, OntarioTracy, what a shame the older generation isn't appreciated for their experience and wisdom, as with other cultures. Your dad must feel so terrible. It was super that you and your sister were in a position to help them. They may not want to take your help, but they will if necessary, I'm sure. It may just be the security they need to have the money sitting there. I hope your dad is able to find another job quickly - I will keep them both in my prayers. Cheers to you and your sis!
Hugs,
Brenda
:hug: :hug: :hug: Thanks gals for all the great ideas you had for helping my parents in other ways as well. I can easily sneak things into the cupboards and fridge as I usually see Mom every day. Dad too now since he's unemployed. I am praying he will find something soon. We live in a small town in a rural area though....makes it a bit tougher. Dad is working on getting his CDL (commercial driver's license). He's almost done with the testing and that will open a few more doors for him in the job market. I know he won't take a trucking job where he'd be gone overnights as he and Mom have never been apart that way. I think there are quite a few companies though that only run during the day so the guys are home at night and on weekends. He was a mechanic specializing in electronics, but has decided he wants to do something else until he can really retire.
Unfortunately, he didn't get any benefits after he was laid off. His boss even 'pro-rated' his vacation from the first of the year until now instead of paying him the full two weeks he was due this year. Mom and Dad were hoping for a decent check in a couple of weeks from the vacation time, but that's not to be either. They are waiting on the unemployment to start...a few weeks or so.
Wow, it sounds like their situation is really pretty common. It's just not right. I think it's so rotten that someone can devote themselves to their job for so long--which my Dad did---and then just get booted out the door. Can you believe they had a little going away party for him on his last day(with a meat and cheese tray 
)? Like this was a planned retirement or something? What a slap in the face!! Sorry, I guess I'm still angry about the whole thing....
Sue Ann--I'm so sorry that this has happened to you and your hubby also. Hope you guys will be okay! and Sophie--Sorry to hear you are also unemployed. Good luck with the job search. Hope something turns up soon!
:hug:
Tracy
Wind Lake. WisconsinTracy you and your sister are indeed wonderful, loving, caring people. Something wonderful will come your parents way.
:hug:
Laurie
Tracy, what a kind, caring and selfless thing you and your sister did. No wonder your mom cried You must be so worried about your parents, and I hope things work out soon.
Tracy,
I'm sorry about what happened to your parents. I think what you did is so nice. I hope your dad finds a job soon. :hug: :hug:
Posts: 1,277Oh, Tracy, I'm so sorry to hear about your father's situation. I truly hope things will get better soon. Best of luck to your dad with the trucking jobs. Your parents are lucky to have such good daughters.
Love Bud Bears by SandyHi Tracy, I don't think your parents will be mad. They might be a little upset since it's natural for them to think they need to take care of you instead of you taking care of them. But I think they'll just realize how much you & your sister really love them. My best wishes for your parents, Sandy
